Sell out

Ergh.

Last last week I got wind of an opportunity I might have to get some of my songs into the commercial music market, which was pretty exciting. So I hopped along to songwriting class today to see what else might come my way (cos I hadn't really talked to the guy since he told me about the opportunity on the phone).

Talk about major let down.

He was blabbering about how he had this "very marketable" girl (a student at the singing school) who would be "great!" for my songs...and he had some ideas for how my songs could be produced, "you know like *insert muso band imitations*"..."we could maybe change a lyric or chord or two"...

Before today I never thought about the concept of "selling out". I mean, I think to make it in the commercial music market (though, fat lot I would know!) you have to give people what they want- you know, supply and demand and all- some people see that as some kind of sell out compromise. And I didn't have a problem with that. But this whole concept of just giving them what really are pieces of me and letting them...well...change chords and lyrics and styles without me getting a look in really grates on me. I mean...even if one of them got out there and was successful...I s'pose it would make it better, but at the moment, I'm taking a big pride cut. Hopefully as I get to know this guy, I'll come to trust him more with my songs. But at the moment....he was playing around with something HE was working on and I thought it was awful (I told him..."That sounds really...90's!")! And all the production ideas he's had for my songs so far have been....only ok (I'm hoping that they sound strange because I'm just not used to hearing them like that!!).

My teacher refers to those who won't let others sing their songs as "precious"...he's said to me twice "O, you're not precious about your songs are you!?". Like I said...I don't think I am, and I don't particularly care if someone else sings them (I'm under no illusions about how far I could go out there...ergh- not very!)...but the fact that they came from MY HEAD...I guess I thought I'd have more say in where they were going! And at the same time, they do know best, and if that's how they think one of my songs will crack the market (by giving it to some unsigned marketable nobody, changing it entirely)...well I suppose they would know right? I dunno. Doesn't sit right with me. Maybe I rate myself too much.

It was all too good to be true! =p Opportunities like that don't just fall into your lap.
If I really want to make it in the music industry, it's going to take a lot of persistence...more persistence than I've ever shown to anything else in my life really!

So at the end of the lesson, I asked him "So what are you going to do with my songs now you have them?"
And me goes "Listen to them...see what I come up with. One step at a time!"

Well he's right about one thing...one step at a time. I'm always in too much of a hurry to go places and get things done anyway.

I suppose at the end of the day, I know God is going to use this for something. All will be revealed in good time....