Maybow, bloody Maybow: Part I

Once upon a time, a girl was scampering away from a gruesome bespectacled Ogre. Her named was Sarah. Sarah was clutching a big lollipop as she flow through the spittle which gloriously sprayed from the depths of the Ogre’s bowels. The Ogre was fiercely possessive of his lollipops, because they were pink and defined his identity and essential bespectacled ogre-ness. These lollipops were irresistible and Sarah has quietly recognised a small mouth protruding from the lollipop’s appendix. She thought to herself, “Am I dreaming?? Is this truly a talking lollipop!? Bunkum!” But she continued to stare fixedly at the small mouth which was forming the words slowly and distinctly: “Steal me!”
“Oh my,” Sarah exclaimed. “I must!”
Suddenly the Ogre (who was prattling away in Spanish) looked suspiciously at a nearby Oompaloompa, who was watching the scene unfold. The Oompaloompa shrugged, saying “I am an Oompaloompa. Hmph!”
“Oh, okay!” said the Ogre, confused. Temporarily stumped, he scratched his head, causing puffs of smoke which obscured the view of Sarah and the disinterested Oompaloompa. Further, the lollipop was beginning to sprout stripes. “I usually sprout tentacles, but it’s the smoke. I am diseased.”
“That’s ok!” replied Sarah, bounding forward, seizing its stick. With an evil leer, the lollipop extended its fangs and began to floss.
“Can I join?” asked the Oompaloompa.
Thus the Flossing trio escaped. BUT, from around the smoke, which had cleared, the King of Floss (the Ogre’s other identity) himself appeared in furious bespectacled glory. The sky darkened and the floor shook with glee.
“Oh crap!” cried Oompaloompa. “I forgot my toothbrush!”
“That’s unimportant compared to forgetting your brain,” replied Sarah,
“Or forgetting your asparagus,” chimed in the Lollipop.

Meanwhile, the Oompaloompa had left the conversation, captured by an eager, but still mildly confused Ogre. On the other side of the room, Sarah widened her eyes in moral quandary. Get out with the Lollipop or cark it! The Oompaloompa whimpered. The rain started to splatter on its hair, but interestingly enough, the Ogre was unmoved.
“Bah,” grumbled the Ogre, scampering after his Lollipop. “Did you know you’re obese?”
“Oi,” said the Oompaloompa, offended. The Ogre scampered on unperturbed.

A door opened (Sarah had come to a door) and a snowman appeared. “Lollipop going there” it gestured.
“Argh!” they squealed in terror.
“I’m trying to help you!”
“He wants to lick me!” groaned the Lollipop.
“Now, I’m trying to HELP you,” said the snowman, exasperated.
“But you smell,” wailed Sarah.
“FINE!” The snowman slammed the door. They all sniggered as they continued their flight from the Ogre.