Tangled

I have a tangled knot of emotions inside me at the moment that I can't make head or tail of. It's just a big knot! I've had some fleeting glimpses of bits and pieces of what might be in there, including vague regrets of how friends' lives have changed without me even knowing (I am/was a big proponent of friends who will still be your friends even though you haven't caught up with them for ages...I'm starting to doubt whether it's actually possible for the most part)...how those aforementioned friends don't know (or care?) what's going on in my life (not much, but still!)...how semi-out-of-place I felt tonight (at one of those aforementioned friend's 22nd)...how jaded I feel...

It's all in knots. So much so that I can't separate them out into separate paragraphs! All I know is that after arriving home tonight, I have a tangled knot of not-very-positive emotion in me, and it wasn't there when I left the house.

I didn't have a very good time tonight.

ETA: I should just qualify here for any possible lurkers that my sentiments were more the result of my own internal angst (and possibly PMS!) than the night itself and people present. Food was lovely, btw, but on this occasion, not enough to over power my inner tangle!