Say Goodbye

Hi everyone,

Well it's finally over- 3 years of my life as a leader have come to a close, and soon...very soon, I'm going to lift the password from this blog, because it won't matter if the kids read it or not (well that's not entirely true, and I still have some residual "should be setting the example" feeling- probably mainly because I still should, title or not, hrrr.)

Over the last week or so I've been at various wrap up things for the year, so I've gotton increasingly melancholic over this whole leaving thing. First there was end of year leader's retreat last week end, which was so nice, because everyone was getting along and having a generally good time (as opposed to those not so nice ones, where there is angst and general tension). Highlights included cooking a damn good breakfast for everyone, having a spa bath with Lynette, complete with grog and bubbles so thick we built a wall out of them, and having a conversation with Lockie whilst sitting on the balcony watching the sun sink into the ocean and sipping a glass of red spiked with lemonade (yum- a bastardised form of sangria!). We also had a final "sharing time" which managed to be not-too-excruciating, and where all the girl leaders who were leaving shed tears (hee). Out of all the things I'll miss about leaving the ministry, I will miss the other leaders the most. It's gonna be weird next year.

Then there was our leader's end of year dinner, which was at a fairly non-descript Chinese restaurant in North Ryde RSL, where Dave drank a whole little bowl of cut chilli in soya sauce for $50 which he didn't end up taking. Go figure! Afterwards we had our carols and Kris Kringle extravaganza (not) back at John's apartment, which included very very loud and often tuneless singing. The funny thing was that we accidentally left the front door ajar and didn't realise til we had almost finished singing. Then we got a call from John's dad (who lives in an apartment in the same block) to tell us to shut up cos they could hear us a few floors away, hee.

THEN was end of year event for everyone (kids + leaders). Had a few testimonies from the kids that night which really reminded me of why youth leadership is so rewarding...one of the chicks, Kate, had only become a Christian half way through the year, but to see how far she'd grown and how much she was getting into God- it was awesome. Makes it all worth while. I also got to lead worship for the last time (in this arena). Hadn't led for so long, and it was kind of poignant, even though it might not have been for anyone else. But I was glad that I got to do it one last time.

THEN yesterday was our last Sunday service for the year, which made it my last sunday service with them. They got all the leaders who were leaving (and there are about 7 of us, btw) out the front and prayed for us, which was again, quite sad. Then I presented an item (sang a song) with Jono playing the gee-tar (which brought home to me how inadequately I communicate musical ideas- I have a feeling it's because I was trying to communicate them to non-musical people tho, ahem!), and seeing all the kids sitting there from the stage was...I dunno. The feeling's hard to describe- bittersweet? I spose that will have to do. We had a final ministry time as well where people were praying for each other and I got to play keys (totally ad hoc) while this was happening...I have lived through that so many times- playing keys while people in front of me are on the floor praying for each other in little huddles, supporting each other while they are crying....I dunno, it's kind of like "my place" if you will. But I was glad to get the opportunity to do that one last time too.

So yeah, many last times over the last week. It's sad- but I think, on some level, I'm ready to move on. I'm ready to meet some new people (are they ready to meet me though??) I'm ready to go to somewhere where I CAN BRING MY UNI FRIENDS, HOW GOOD IS THAT?? (I've been waiting for that for a long time!) I just hope that I've left behind something of worth with the kids and the ministry as a whole...that I've left some kind of legacy. I don't know if I have, but it's too late now.

On a totally different aside, something I won't miss is hanging around teenagers when they talk about alcohol like it's SOME BIG, INTRINSICALLY VALUABLE DEAL. Had one of the girls' surprise 18th yesterday and to hear them go on about it...ERRRRR. Get over it.

Going to CHRISTINA TONIGHT!!!! Hope it's good. And I hope I get an ok parking space for not too much money. But at least I have some kind of buffer- I don't think she'll be on til 8:30 and I'm not too keen on seeing Emmanuel Carella (even if I did like Too Beautiful)- and it's reserved seating, so it should be ok!

AND, I'm going away with my school friends for the rest of the week on Tuesday, which should be interesting if nothing else.

I'll keep you posted!
ciao xxoo