Grrr....intruder on my blog!! O well, guess I couldn't keep it hidden from him for long, and I suppose after the nice message, we are all square! Please don't fall off the earth...be careful!! Love you xxoo

Ok, that's the 5th time I've lost a what I've written (my aunty vacuumed straight into the computer's powerpoint...arrgh!)....good thing I've lost it so many times I haven't had the chance to write that much!!

I don't know why, but it takes ages for my page to load correctly after I've changed my template...and I've been trying to get my tagboard thingy to work by randomly pasting bits of code into my template....argh! I'm SO NOT a computer nerd.

Aaaanywayz, for the last few days I have been non-house bound which is why I haven't been blogging. Thursday I went to work for the first time in two weeks, which was ok. I actually don't mind the work I do- I like being surrounded by pretty sparkly things (I work in a jewellery store). Then yesterday I went out to have lunch with the aforementioned intruder, which was probably worth a whole blog entry itself. We were supposed to go to this Belgian cafe thingy for lunch, so I was checking it out on-line before I left home. Funny thing was (and I guess it's more obvious now in hindsight) there was thing thought in the back to of my head saying "Better not check it out too much and get your hopes up". But I don't think I was into listening to little thoughts like that at that stage! So we got there (twas a very wet and dreary afternoon yesterday) and apparently we won't get a table for about half an hour....bf didn't want to wait (too busy to, I guess), so we left. Dunno exactly why, but I was SO disappointed, I started crying. I think I just don't like to get my expectations raised and then not have them fulfilled...I've always been a bit like that- taking disappointments really hard. But still....heck, it's lunch and the place is always going to be there...I don't know. I think it was a culmination of things.
1) I really was looking forward to lunch after checking it out and all! I'm a foodie. So sue me!
2) I wanted to indulge myself with something that I wanted to do.
3) PMS?? More on that later!!

So eventually we ended up going to a so-so cafe in Lindfield and for our trouble, got a $147 parking fine for parking in a clearway. I actually did have a brief look at the sign when we parked (on this big fat highway) but for some funny reason (blame hunger) I presumed that 1P 12-3pm meant that outside the stated time interval it was untimed. Duh. O well!!

In the past two weeks, I really have been exercised in the way of selflessness. I seriously don't think I'm very good at it at all. I miss being able to do things I want to do- tp have some control over my life. My mum keeps saying that now this stuff with my sister's happened that I should re-sort my priorities. But, really, all I want to do is have my life be normal again. And to retain some semblance of normality, I WANT to keep working and I WANT to keep up with everything I do at church. My boyfriend kept saying to me "O you're too busy and tired. You should stop doing stuff at church and take a break." But you know, as much as I'm doing stuff for God, I'm also doing it for me...to keep my life normal and as full as possible. I guess that might be selfish, but I dunno. It's how it is at the moment. Plah.

O that's rite, I was coming back to the PMS thing. The thing about PMS is that you can consciously be thinking "O goodness, WHY am I acting like this, it's so stupid!!' with one part of your mind but then not really being able to control what you are doing, because the rest of you is going for the moody/sad/mad bit, gung-ho! But, in case those males out there are looking at this for a reason to just IGNORE moody females, just because it might be PMS doesn't make the feelings and sentiments expressed any less real. So think about it!